Duck Season

Its the day for duck hunting now, for duck hunting,
A gunshot as the ducks go by, feathers dropping,
As guns sling, a lot I’ll bring by, a lot I’ll bring,
So much birds falling from the sky.

Verse 1
I’m hiding in this bush with my master,
He got an iron pipe that sounds like a monster,
He aims and shoots one of these natural helicopters,
When it hits the bird its like a K.O. from a boxer,
I rushed to the bird like I am a doctor,
When I reached the bird, it was a damn good actor,
Trying to play dead, but then I couldn’t bother,
So I sunk my teeth in it and carried it away after.

Verse 2
The big dogs that are barking there in the out-field make me feel like a pup,
Two words not to confuse in this season are move and duck,
And everything that you will see are falling down,
And all I smell is only chicken, yeah,
The man with the least birds shot down is called the underdog,
I resent that name, worse when my team is who carried home almost all,
Every time I carry in a duck its like I can’t swallow my dinner,
And the back of the van is loaded with ducks but giving me one is hard to consider……

Its the day for duck hunting now, for duck hunting,
A gunshot as the ducks go by, feathers dropping,
As guns sling, a lot we bring now, a lot I’ll bring, a lot I’ll bring, a lot I’ll bring yeah,
Fling north, or flying south, like its leaving a winter time somewhere else,…..

I Shot The Sheriff Parody PG13

I got the mail if the mailman punks out I’m your secretary, woof woof woof
I chat the language that makes the paper boy upset with me, woof woof woof,(repeat)

Everyday I’m paranoid when sleeping on the lawn,
Caz of that kid who seems as if he can’t pass me by,
I admit I thought he said ‘Extra extra, eat all about it now,
But when I ran to the gate, missiles were thrown,
I thought he had food, but he stuffed newspapers in my mouth,
He tried it again, woof woof woof, he’s crying out “down down boy!”

Verse 2
I havent eaten all day so things start to look like puppy chow,
This guy comes on and walked pass me in my yard,
No one’s home, he works for the UPS and has mail from the IRS,
My master taught me not to like that sound,
He hears me growling but the gate is just too far now,
He makes a run for it, woof woof woof, he’s crying out “down down boy!”

Verse 3
I thought these enemies would stay away and give me piece of mind,
Days passed and I see no problems in sight,
I guess I should see it coming ’cause of what I did the mailman’s shoes and the paperboy’s bike,
But I smelled the scent of stake and voice saying “come here boy”,
They threw me a metal in gravy that broke my 4 canines,
And now I say “Arrrh Arrrh, Arrrh Arrrh,

Iron Lion Zion

Verse 1
I’m under locks, from the day when they hit me with those rocks,
I thought I gripped his toe, but his shoe was big,
Now I have some Jordans and Nike hiding,

If I find you on my lawn,
I’ll get my K-9 on,
Make you re-buy one, (repeat)

Verse 2
All age kids on the watch,
Then they sneaked in for fruits that had dropped,
I grabbed a timberland boot, and ruined the thing,
So barefooted the kid walked home crying.

Verse 3
I got this reebok, dangling from my teeth and,
An Adidas Sport and about 10 other sneakers, see,
These kids just run, left their shoes with me me, oh yeah,
And I would give it back, but each time they reach here, I get some more…….

Old Rover PG13

The story of Old Rover, he barks like he has lung cancer,
And yes he has a foul odor, he hides from baths on a regular,
At home he attracts mosquitoes, he hates the vets for his medicals
And yes he is a rottweiler, who loves to search for used diapers

Verse 1
I say, when he growls it makes no sense, sounds like an old van is trying to start behind the fence,
When he’s asleep call a doctor, you’ll think he needs CPR when he rolls over,
His kennel looks like it got massacred, he looks as ugly as the predator,
His master is a blind man, who thinks he has a better sight than, than Mr. good for nothing Old Rover…….

Verse 2
Sometimes he sees his food he’s like hey yow you dis me,
Where do you think this dog is from,
Then he push away the doggy dishy like its not a meaty bone, but a piece of yam,
And he is not a show closer, it’s been a while since he got himself a spouse-a
Other dogs use their nose and can tell that Rover needs a roll-on and a shower,

Its the story of the doggy old Rover,
Just hear his barking sounds like he has lung cancer,
And yes he has a damn foul odor, and he hides from baths on a regular,

When water touch him he says Woi yoi yo, woi yo yoi yo, woi yoi yoi yo yoi yo yoi yo
Woi yoi yo, woi yo yoi yo, woi yoi yoi yo yoi yo yoi yo,
Doggy Old Rover, man he loves the garbage ca-a-a-an woi yoiee,
He looks way older than Noah and Abraham,
Dog heaven made him stay-ay-ayyyy down here!

Said he is the doggie Old Rover……………Chorus repeat.

Poodle Of Mine

Oh poodle of mine,
She’s a b*tch who stood me up here all night,(so cute and so fine)

Verse 1
From the verandah, I stared as those cars passed,
I almost fell asleep when her master stepped by,
But then I see her long legs and rushed to the gate like she telephoned me,
And I sniffed her and lifted my hind legs and marked her as my territory,
Her coat was so clean I smelled myself and bath was saying ‘hello’,
Whatever the case was, my territory marking now made her yellow,
She’s so pretty she could tell me to sit boy, roll-over or fetch it,
But when she left the sidewalk, what I saw was a chihuahua, spaniel or a ‘SHIT’!

Verse 2
She said that she would meet me last night, but let me down like a deflated balloon,
And tonight I heard and another dog together howling at the full moon,
In all my dog years that’s the only tongue sticking out that runs thru my mind,
Now I’m not seeing her anymore and I wonder if its ‘cuz I smelled her behind,
I’ve looked everywhere when driving by, you can see my head outside of the damn land cruiser,
I can barely sleep, barely eat, and the cat sees and walks in my food and calls me loser,
I dug up my savings just for her, and thieves almost robbed my 10 bones,
‘Cuz I was on the lonely road so alone, wondering why she lied and I was walking back home, but hey hey
All I wanted was to sniff her right, all I wanted was to give her a bite, all I wanted was to sniff her right, all I wanted was to give her a bite now,……….

Turn Your Lights Down Low PG13

I feel like I would give you some bone,
When I’m around you I feel like a rude little puppy,
Your bite feels so right, you sniff me so right, so right,
When I’m around you i feel like a rude little puppy,

Last time we bumped nose,
I was clean and you were dirty,
We howled at the moon that night, and then,
My master says he doesn’t want that stray dog in the yard again,
The pain, ooh, I scratched a long long time,
My toe-nail shaved off all my fur,
Damn it seems it happened because of that night,
Anyway a mutt like me just might forget with unconditional love,
But, b*tch clean yourself next time, next time…..

Verse 2
Won’t your bites turn wrong?,
B*tch, I’m loving how your fur don’t have ticks now now, not right now,
‘Cause the last time fleas were on your skin
My master had to give me a bath again,
I scratched like oooh, look what your bugs do?
But now I see patches of your fur removed, well done, you’ve pleased bruno,
Roooooff, I love ya,(clears throat) I rov ya,
If my fore-legs were hands right now,
I would check you lice, liiice,
Just to ensure that I won’t howl tonight, but anyway……

At The Beach

They thought I’m rescuing on the beach,
But this rasta dog is not going to save no one today,
I’m chilling with no leash and a pina colada in my paw,
Why people think that they’re mermaids?

I see you cross the line ’cause you said you could swim,
And then now, wow your dying quick as doggie could quint,
Now you want help to drag you back onto shore,
But doggie hates saltwater and wet birthday clothes,
Wait til the fat lady sings, people just aren’t listening,
Whenever I’m rescuing, they think its time for wrestling,
The deep blue is for drowning in,
If you’re not a trout within, save you? You’re kidding.

Verse 2
I’m here to eat fish, not be eaten by one,
I know how to get rid of my ticks with methods on dry-land,
Have you ever felt drowning? Be my guest, try mon,
I’m not going to the underworld, I am not a lycan,
Have you ever seen a great white jump out at you for something to eat?
No? Well, keep it that way,
I used to think I was the baddest thing alive until I watched discovery channel and saw a whale……

At The Vet

Verse 1
Every dog has a pride compromised when the vet looks at him,
Don’t you ever lift my tail, I don’t like that, I might block your nostrils,
Making checks on you eyes and your mouth, and doing more than how fleas would bug you,
It gets worse, when they stick you with shots, an avalanche happens the way I yoddle.

Even when flea bites your hide with all its might and continues all night,
Its nothing that’s quite as punishing like who’s dressed in all white, I fret for my life…
He checked my mouth and said I have tooth decay,
He checked my ears and said I am almost deaf,
He checked my eyes and said I have little sight left,
He checked my life and said I…..thought he said one more day.

Verse 2
One more day for my checks at, at the usual venue,
I’m starting to feel there’s a feline under there being the devil,
Saying that my blood pressure is sky-high, but it’s only cause I see you as terrible,
It’s funny how one check up done here leads to the number being doubled.

Chant Down Babylon

The cat says he’s close with animals who do crime,
What’s worse is, he says their his family serving time,
They are leopards, tigers, lions, jaguars, cheetahs and black panthers,
He says they’re at the zoo, I can look at them just for now….

Verse 1
I beat him up last night, so revenge is what he’s now waiting to take,
Don’t know whether or not he’s bluffing, but he keeps laughing and says I’m not safe
I heard a tiiiiiger and a lion roar, and it was happening in the house,
Shortly I saw the cat with the remote,
He says that’s just a zoo clip,
When I get those animals to you skip,
You will see that they’re coming on a food trip,
Why do you think I’m saving all these toothpicks,
Yeh, you will get what’s coming, man….

Verse 2
He says you’re just an overgrown mouse to me,
So I will introduce an overgrown cat to beat,
Tiger will eat you like Hindu prasadam,
And I’ll be near you to share you to everyone,
I heard a tiiiiiger and a lion roar, and it was happening in the house,
Shortly I saw the cat with the remote,
He says that’s just a zoo clip,
When I get those animals to you skip,
You will see that they’re coming on a food trip,
Why do you think I’m saving all these toothpicks,
Yeh, you will get what’s coming, man….

Dog Mourning African Herbsman

Verse 1
I’m hurt in me deep, Its not all the type roses I see them bring,
Two weeks it’s been, my master, he is now gone away,
I can’t eat a thing, I know something’s wrong,
He’s not reading newspapers and flatulating along,
Where’s the man who needs bathing, and always scratching his balls,
With that disgusting cough………..

People weeping and I bark, you hear weeping in my baaarrrkk,
He used to urinate right over there, and burnt the fields when he’s watering the flowers,
You hear weeping in my baaarrrkkkk….

Verse 2
His skin had more dirt than outside on the ground,
His breath smells like food that I would just leave alone,
But he treated me good, everyday I eat 3 times, but my doo-doo stayed til they dry……

Verse 3
Master was a good man who had lots of friends,
A girl once rejected him, she mentioned deodorant,
His teeth looks gold-plated, few looks like he chewed coal, Flies always recognize him in those clothes…..

about admin

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

You may use these HTML tags and attributes:
<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>