I was telling my dog how my neighbor is a quick hello wave-er. What I mean by that is this; when he sees me from afar, he raises his arm and flicks his hand back and forth just once while simultaneously bowing his head. The head bow is a signal that the ‘hello’ moment is complete.

My little buddy listened intently as I explained how the neighbor gives the hello wave recipient approximately 1.3 seconds to respond or the giver will not see the returned favor. I suppose he does this so that if the neighborly gesture is not returned, he won’t know the difference. He is Catholic so he probably feels guilty about everything.

Therefore, when I see him in his yard I must position myself in quick-draw mode. I watch him intently with my hand locked-and-loaded and at the ready. I wait with intense patience and I cannot afford to blink. I hear the theme music from ‘The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly’ whistling through my head.

Beads of sweat form on my forehead as the camera of life cuts to extreme close-up on my eyeballs. I wait for the moment with restrained jubilation. I wait for it… wait for it… then bawooosh! Yes! Successful hello wave returned!

Then I immediately dial 911 with my nose because I seem to dislocate my shoulder from this lightning speed quick-draw hello wave. As the ambulance carts me away, I give my dog a thumbs-up and a wink. Then he scratched his ear with his paw. In my mind, that meant that he heard me.

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