Honey Boo Boo was a golden retriever, black lab and German shepherd mix. She was friendly, smart and could have been a great therapy Dog if I needed one, but I don’t!
One day, Honey Boo was in the back seat when we picked up my friend Skylar. She was a Dum Dums lollipop fiend. She loved Dum Dums. Unfortunately, it seemed like the lollipops were making her just like the brand name. But that’s neither here nor there. She’s a good person with a heart of gold like Mary Lou Retton and her medal. Skylar and I had to stop at Walgreens to get pregnancy tests and our anti-depression medication, so we left Honey Boo Boo in the car.
When we got back in the car, all we heard was this sucking sound. It sounded like my friend Joe Wang when he would eat his noodles, but I knew Joe Wang wasn’t in the car because I didn’t see any chopsticks around. When I looked in the back, I saw Honey Boo Boo sucking on one of Skylar’s Dum Dums. We both started laughing and thought that was Smart Smart of Honey Boo Boo to find the Dum Dums and start eating them.
Honey Boo Boo’s life wasn’t always so hunky dory. When she was 5 months old, she was run over by a large SUV. I thought Honey Boo’s dog pageant days were over. But then the doctor told me that he had never seen a dog with such a will to live. I thought maybe it was because I was such a good pet owner to her. Skylar said it was because of the Dum Dums. The doctor said Honey Boo Boo also showed incredible loyalty to our family. I told the doctor it’s because she lives in a comfortable dog house, we only feed her gourmet food and we bathe her in Evian spring water at least once a month.
Honey Boo Boo was able to pull through. She had a dislocated hip, a bruised paw, internal bleeding, broken ribs and a low self-esteem. But I knew I would be able to nurse her back to good health because that’s how I started my life and I turned out just fine. Honey Boo Boo was on oxygen for three days and survived it all. She better have survived it all or I was going to kill her because the bills came out to $15,000! But it was all worth it. She was healthy and happy and I could start training her for the dog pageants again and hopefully make some of that money back.
Honey Boo loves to lie upside down and smile especially if she sees another golden retriever/black lab mix passing by. She shakes both paws, high fives, sits pretty and will sneeze if you don’t give her proper recognition for all of the tricks she can do. We love her. She’s our Honey Boo Boo!